community, family, family structure, legal issues, medical issues, out, support
Alex: Um, when we first became family together, there were just the two children.
Tara: Okay.
AM: Um, there was my oldest girl, who uh, she has a different father. And they both had uh, their oldest son, GS. And uh, we just decided “You know, we’re not done”.
Tara: Okay.
Jessica: Yes which there was a lot of opposition from family. They were concerned. uh, “What are you” you know, “Does this make you a sexual deviant? Are your kids going to be, you know, is this a negative effect? What do you do in front of your children?” It was just like this whole mind-blowing scenario where they thought that we were like Loony Tunes, and you meet us and it’s perfectly fine, you know. It’s not like that. Um, so there was some uh, you know, court stuff, and uh, children’s lawyer things, things like that.
Alex: Yup.
Jessica: But uh, you know, we were deemed the best place to be, and everything’s gravy with the other side. And you know, communication is good.
Alex: We had a lot of support from uh, people like our family physician, and-
Jessica: Yeah.
Alex: And the children’s teachers, and people in the community that knew us.
Tara: Right.
Alex: We had a lot of support from basically everybody, I think that we knew.
Jessica: Yup.
Alex: And so that was, really, really good to feel like the community had your back, and that’s nice.
Jessica: And then yeah, we had two more kids. It was a little, people are very encouraged to come by and see your kids when you have like the heteronormative like, father, mother, kid. It’s a very exciting thing. But it was very quiet at our house. There wasn’t, there wasn’t visitors.
Alex: It was difficult at the hospital too, because I recall it was the first time they’d ever encountered a situation where there was more than two parents.
Tara: Right.
Alex: So they had to issue another bracelet for the parents.
Jessica: But they did that. They tried to accommodate us.
Alex: They just like called in a a social working and interviewed us, and made sure that we, you know, “Well who’s going to be like the mother, who’s going to be the father?”
Jessica: When we explained it, they were like “Okay” and they were hands off and it was okay, it was you know, all lovely, it was all good. But it was a different experience, unfortunately, than uh, when we had our first child, yeah. Well mind you, then we were still teenagers going to college and no one was very happy. No one was very proud of us about that.
Alex: Yes. Those were entirely different situations.
Jessica: So it was, it was a little, little weird for people at first. But we like, bonded like mad, and our kids were in lo- like really enjoyed each other, and were really close ages.
Alex: The oldest two are two weeks apart.