Keywords:
racism, homophobia, student relationships, support, closeted
racism, homophobia, student relationships, support, closeted
Transcript
Victoria: So some of them know, and some don’t. And I don’t remember at this point now-
Tara: Right.
Victoria: Because it’s been a couple of years. Like who might be, and who no. I do know that there was one girl, S came home again, recently, so this is where there’ll be push back in certain spaces. But then, and she said “I don’t like hanging with this girl because she makes, she makes nasty comments about people, and she makes racist and homophobic comments, and I don’t like hanging out with her” and I said “well that sounds like a good choice!”
Tara: Yeah.
Victoria: Sounds like not a person you’d want to be hanging with, right? And so, that was, yeah.
Tara: And one of the reasons I ask that question is I’m wondering, you know, is if S, your daughter has support at school. Like so those girls who told the new girl “oh that’s not cool to talk about someone’s mom like that” do you think your daughter has friends who would do that for her?
Victoria: You know what, I think that she does.
Tara: Yes.
Victoria: Like I don’t see these girls, and I actually think a couple of them, their moms have met my partner even. But once she said “mom can you not mention your partner” like if I go to school for something, or whatever. And I, being that that’s her space, and we are trying to deal with a lot of other things too, right?
Tara: Yeah.
Victoria: So I said, “fine, that’s your space, I won’t interject that.” Um, but I feel like there would be, but I think she just--
Tara: She hasn’t mobilized it.
Victoria: She hasn’t mobilized it. And I think she just doesn’t want to put herself in the space of not knowing. So there was a time when I said “why don’t you talk to any of your friends about what’s going on? Why don’t you, you know, talk about your mom as in a relationship?” She had told one friend, and she said that one friend was fine. Um, but that was like, I think when I first had come out to her. Um, but since then, I don’t think she’s shared it. But now, my sister um, said that S actually does have a friend who has two moms. But she hasn’t told me about it, so I’m not supposed to know.
Victoria: So some of them know, and some don’t. And I don’t remember at this point now-
Tara: Right.
Victoria: Because it’s been a couple of years. Like who might be, and who no. I do know that there was one girl, S came home again, recently, so this is where there’ll be push back in certain spaces. But then, and she said “I don’t like hanging with this girl because she makes, she makes nasty comments about people, and she makes racist and homophobic comments, and I don’t like hanging out with her” and I said “well that sounds like a good choice!”
Tara: Yeah.
Victoria: Sounds like not a person you’d want to be hanging with, right? And so, that was, yeah.
Tara: And one of the reasons I ask that question is I’m wondering, you know, is if S, your daughter has support at school. Like so those girls who told the new girl “oh that’s not cool to talk about someone’s mom like that” do you think your daughter has friends who would do that for her?
Victoria: You know what, I think that she does.
Tara: Yes.
Victoria: Like I don’t see these girls, and I actually think a couple of them, their moms have met my partner even. But once she said “mom can you not mention your partner” like if I go to school for something, or whatever. And I, being that that’s her space, and we are trying to deal with a lot of other things too, right?
Tara: Yeah.
Victoria: So I said, “fine, that’s your space, I won’t interject that.” Um, but I feel like there would be, but I think she just--
Tara: She hasn’t mobilized it.
Victoria: She hasn’t mobilized it. And I think she just doesn’t want to put herself in the space of not knowing. So there was a time when I said “why don’t you talk to any of your friends about what’s going on? Why don’t you, you know, talk about your mom as in a relationship?” She had told one friend, and she said that one friend was fine. Um, but that was like, I think when I first had come out to her. Um, but since then, I don’t think she’s shared it. But now, my sister um, said that S actually does have a friend who has two moms. But she hasn’t told me about it, so I’m not supposed to know.