Strategies, Explaining, Talking with Teachers
Pa: And I’m comfortable, I don't, I don’t think I’ve ever been like, “Well, they have two moms”, I don’t do it that way. I’m like, “Yeah, so my wife, uh and I will be registering them.” So, I’m very comfortable with that and so I’ve always been. And that might be the difference of Zena working so long in the bank and feeling that different. And I work in, in community, I work with an autism program and I work with uh, behaviour services. So you know, I, it’s just way easier for me to be way open about it. Not with families but with colleagues--
Pa: So, I think I was just really ready for that. Just, I had no worries about it. But for them (motioning to Tristin and Ely), I have talked to teachers and said um, you know (turns to Ely), there’s a story of, you remember? Ely went to camp--
Pa: a, a daycamp. And this kid kept saying to him, “Well, what does your dad do?” And he was saying, “I don’t have a dad.” Right? And I think he was probably 5 maybe 6. And the kid’s like, “You have to have a dad.” And he’s like, “I don’t have a dad.” And he’s like, well, by the end of the week, he said his father died—he was a fireman—and he died in a fire.
Ely: (smiles and shrugs) Just to make it stop.
Pa: It, it—make it stop! He made it stop.
Tara: Make it stop. (laughter)
Ely: He was annoying.
Pa: But the daycare staff knew me from my experience working with them with other, with my clients, and they told me the story, “I just want you to know, Ely said this to another kid. And I said, “Well, I understand why. He was being asked the same question, over and over again.” So, that, that seemed to work. Now, I talked to Ely and I said, “You know, you can just say, ‘I just don’t.’”
Pa: Right? You don’t have to say “I have two moms” if you feel like someone’s going to pick on you in that moment because they’re not important to you, right?
Pa: If they’re important to you at school, you might. But if they’re just a kid at camp, you don’t have to if that’s—but anyway, yeah.
Ely: True, because you only see him for a week.
Pa: You only see him for a week! And then, they’re gone. So, so, I would share that with teachers and–
Pa: and that that’s what he did when he just couldn’t—because there are kids that age who have never experienced it—
Pa: whose parents have maybe never explained to them.